Dated : September 1, 1991 3 noon

11:23 PM
I have asked the headmaster a million times before and another million times since the sun shone its first rays on castle today but the headmaster just wont answer. He kept ignoring the first few attempts and then at breakfast, he gave me a stern look and said "What shall happen cannot be avoided Severus."

For the past eleven years Albus Dumbledore came out as a totally different personality for me. Now that I look back, I had indeed been foolish enough to think him as an enemy. He exemplifies how power is not to be faught for but with knowledge and wisdom, it finds its way to you. Ten years have passed of that horrible night but not a single days goes by without giving me chills. Every morning the mirror shouts back at me saying I was the cause of her death - Lily's death. How can it be? I cant... Had I known the consequences, I would have given my life but saved hers. Dumbledore sir never mentioned the incident to me. At times it was discussed in my presence but he would always protect me. He shields me like a father would... the father I never knew.

Today, all my emotions come up because I would tonight come face to face with what I have been running, all these years, from. Hagrid had mysteriously gone somewhere the last week... when he returned, I heard the name. This time the name wasnot accompanied with anger but mostly guilt and fear. I fear a boy wizard who is just eleven years. Though he is known to have defeated the greatest Dark Lord of all times but still the boy merely knew he was a wizard until a fortnight back. Dumbledore sensed this and he called me to his office after lunch. There he told me that the boy's return to the magical world can be seen as two ways by one - haunting or soothing. The boy can either reflect my past or provide me a way to repent, a way to apologise to Lily. Dumbledore said if I took care of the boy, though it will not reduce the guilt of what I had done, but it will be a way of becoming better. - And I think Dumbledore is correct.

Harry Potter - the boy who lived, I have no clue how things might turn out when we see each other but I certainly know one thing - things are going to change. Very much.

'I am sorry odour'

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